Friend socials at the Matador from 1988
1988
“I came out to a social with Birmingham
Friend that used to be held at a pub at the Holloway Head (The [Matador)] which
was a straight pub but the landlord was gay-friendly. He let a room out of a
Friday night. I was quite shocked and a little naive. It was full of
predominantly old men 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s. Some of them involved in the Friend
counseling charity didn't have the best intentions and were using it in my
opinion for their own sexual exploitation of people who were vulnerable. Some of
the men there were using it as a chat-up place. I was quite disillusioned
because you grow up with all these negative feelings about being gay and then
you meet a lot of stereotypes that you have and you're being tolerant because
you want to kind of fit in although they're not really your type of people. I
always felt very much on the outside that they weren't that really interested in
me and I had nothing in common with them. After a few visits to the Matador I
was quite put off with it. I couldn't really relate to people that were sort of
making little sexual innuendos. I just wanted to find somebody I could get along
with, someone of my own age.
Contributed by: Derek, 35